sunday...

my opa died today...suddenly i don't feel so invincible. i'm going to miss you, opa.

writer's block...

i haven't written in a while, mostly due to a number of events that have kept me away from my house and my beloved internet. these events have kept my brain in full swing but i am not able to focus long enough to write these thoughts down and express them to their fullest. perhaps a little more sleep and a nice lunch will do the trick.

auto-therapy...

so i had to put together a presentation of my spiritual autobiography, which was my one and only assingment for my one and only class this semester. having to put it together was like going through therapy...thinking about past events, looking at who i was and who i am now. while i feel a lot better now that it is done, i feel it is the beginning of something. i'm trying to process the whole experience because, unlike any presentation i have made before, this one was followed by my classmates making comments and asking questions about my experience. it was the only time that i felt i was an expert on the topic i was presenting.
i prepared for the presentation by sitting at my computer, listening to music (damien rice), staring out the window and basically typing a transcript of my thoughts. i think some of those thoughts might show up here in the next few weeks. why waste a good thing, you know what i mean?

a brand new sound...

i love listening to a brand new cd and being so excited by what i am hearing and just waiting in anticipation for what is coming next. my firend lauren keeps feeding me this great music that is just amazing. the newest suggestion has been damien rice's 'o' album...very mellow and lovely. i used it as my soundtrack to my presentation which i will write more about later...

pretend like nothing's happening...

i keep imagining a situation of walking into a coffee shop (which i do once or twice a day) and seeing a sign on the door that says 'pretend like nothing's happening.' i wonder how my behaviour would change. would i go in looking for something to be out of the ordinary so that i knew what i was pretending wasn't happening or would i just go about life as usual and actually not realize if anything was happening at all...

for the birthday girl...

happy birthday to the best sister in the world...uh, my sister Julia!

to do list...

i have a to do list that isn't getting shorter. i don't think it is even possible to complete an entire to do list beause there is always something to do but that doesn't stop me from the attempt. perhaps i should put things on my list that are actually completely out of my control so then when i do finish the possible things, i will feel quite good about my self.

TO DO:
- laundry
- call Rosie
- buy milk
- solve world hunger
- clean the bathroom

commitments...

well i see that my commitment to writing everyday sure did hold strong...for the one day that i actually wrote. i guess that shows how disciplined i am. seriously though...the way i figure it, the more often i write the better i will get at it. right now i feel like my writing is pretty crappy. if i keep at it, maybe in a few months my writing will become half decent, maybe even average. time and dedication may just boost my writing abilities to mediorce or equivilant to a sixth grade reading level...only time will tell.

back to basics...

so i haven't been too faithful in writing but today for some reason i am feeling that writing out thoughts needs to be more of a priority. i feel like something clicked today and i am learning something new, but i can't really point to what that is quite yet. perhaps it will unfold as i attempt to write a little each day.
i need to start thinking about my 'spiritual autobiography' for class for next week and i guess all the reflecting brings up old experiences that are seen through a new perspective, almost as if i am learning from them for a second time. well, i guess it isn't like i am almost learning from them but i am actually learning from my past. i think that makes me a historian.

day...i lost track

i haven't posted anything for too long. i promise i will write something tonight.

have you ever had a moment where reality doesn't quite feel like reality and you wonder 'am i a frozen head like that guy from vanilla sky'? i did once...then i took a picture.

day ten

it was snowing today as i walked to campus and i walked past this kid who was trying to catch snowflakes on his tongue. it was like a flashback to the 1950s or something...but then the kid swore when a flake got him in the eye. ah...that's what i'm talking about.

day nine

today i watched the jetsons as i ate my lunch. if i had a glass of tang, i would be eight years old again. the weird thing about being older and i guess smarter is realizing that certain things about that show really don't make sense. like how can they ride around on moving sidewalks, hovering cars and floating chairs and not suffer from severe obesity. they get no exercise for goodness sake. but i guess if you eat all your food in pill form, you don't really pack on the pounds.

day eight

ok. so today i was chatting with a friend and she was drinking and then just suddenly spat her water all over someone's coat. frikin' hilarious if you ask me. but then, the girl who owned the jacket came over and was like 'uh...why is my jacket wet?' i could do nothing but play dumb on that one but everyone suspects the girl peeing her pants from laughter. haha...

day seven

election day in the US. what will be the outcome? such a charged and overwhelming lead up to this election. democracy seemed to get so complicated, picking someone to represent us actually lead us to not even be able to understand our nieghbour who disagrees with us. i write like i am voting, but not being a US citizen i'm not, so why should i care? hmm...why do i keep asking myself crazy questions? there...i did it again.

day six

first day of november means that october is over. when the heck did that happen? stuff like this makes me feel old.