wanted: answers...

i feel like a big breakthrough has happened.  this week at bible study, one student admitted 'i don't get it,' and the rest of the room agreed with him.  i am co-leading a small group with a student on monday nights and we are working through the first half of the gospel of mark.  up to this week, we've had a lot of the introduction stuff, building up to starting to see Jesus' real identity.  we know he has been preaching, healing various diseases and casting out demons but now we're getting into more descriptive stories of actual healings (the leper and the paralytic) and the questions coming up are awesome. 

i am really encouraged that people feel comfortable to admit they don't understand and are working together to try and figure out what the text is saying aout Jesus.  it is a little painful at times because i see how much they want to get it but the answers just don't come immediately.

i find it hard to lead in moments like this because i want to just tell them the answer but half the time i don't have an answer myself and i know that the process of seeking an answer can be an meaningful as finding the answer itself.  i am also having a hard time assessing how we are doing in the big picture because i have only ever done the mark study in one-week intensive sessions.  doing on one passage a week is a big change.

i was encouraged this week too by a number of students and especially those in my small group being very eager to pray for my fundraising because they want me to be back on campus.  it is nice to know i am missed and i strongly agree with them that i need to get back on to campus.

if you have time and think of it, i would appreciate your prayers for Jesus to provide the money i need to meet my budget for this year.

then and now...

well i must say that the gang at 15 hollywood did an excellent job pulling together their hallowe'en party on saturday night (complete with haunted basement). i know that it was a bit of a concern for some because it would be one of the first times that they have been at a party with their non-Christian friends. i think many had the worst-case-scenario in mind but it was a kickin' good time. definitely the funniest story i heard from the night was a girl dressed like a crayon was accidentally dropped when a guy tried to write his name in the air with her. she's totally fine and the mental picture is too funny. it was of course a costume party and no one was allowed in the door without a costume. i went as myself at age 5, which expresses why i hate costumes so much.

definitely a lot cuter in a dog suit when i was little but good to know i still got the frown down pat. got some good laughs at the party.

not easy, but great...

teaching at large group went well last night. i spoke on a passage from the gospel of mark where peter and the disciples identify Jesus as the Messiah for the first time and Jesus teaches them what the Messiah and what a disciple of the Messiah really looks like. all in all, i learned that Jesus taught it isn't going to be easy but it is going to be great.
there were so many new people, probably the most since the first week of the semester. having not been there for a while, i wasn't sure if it was just that i was the new person but others told me that there were a greater number of new people than usual. it was great to see. it was also great because people seemed really receptive to me while i was speaking. some even laughed at my jokes, which is great because 1. people never used to laugh while i spoke, 2. it wasn't my funniest of material, 3. it helps the ego a little bit. what was even more fantastic was that i didn't notice any of the new people sitting by themselves and people were trying to get to know them. this is a huge step in a lot of ways for our community and it is so encouraging to see people starting to step up and make a difference.
i am still trying to figure out a halloween costume idea for the party one of the student houses is throwing on saturday night. the deadline is quickly approaching so i will have to find a costume stat...

reminded of the goal...

over the last week, i have had a number of wonderful conversations with people about life. and like real life stuff. focussing more on fundraising this semester has left me with a little 'good conversation' withdrawl, but my cheating this week and making time to meet with a few students was definitely worth it. i need to figure out how to pray for my fundraising to come in so i can get back onto campus and doing the things i really love doing (and may i note, i am way better at than fundraising...i'm just saying).
i am teaching tomorrow night at large group so that means i get to sneak in some visits there too. i don't want to make it sound like i am under house arrest until i reach my budget goal but it is more that i have put really strict boundaries around what i am doing because i really need to get this fundraising done and that won't happen unless i focus most of my attention on it. the goal of finishing it by december is still relatively realistic, so i am happy about that.
on another note, i totally bombed a quix today in ethics that i didn't study for. i only recieved the text book for the class last week (ordering online works by its own calendar) so being half way through the semester before i feel lost is not a bad run.

the good old days...

i had dinner with some friends who used to kick around MAC back when i was a student and we had a great time catching up and remembering the old days. it is hard sometimes to believe where MAC IV was just 3 years ago and to see the tremendous growth God has been spurring on for our vision and ministry. it isn't that the old days were bad, God was still at work but i feel so priviledged to be able to still be around to see the transformation happening on campus.
maybe you are all thinking i use the word transformation way too much but i have a very limited vocabulary and it is the only word i can think of to express what i have experienced. people are very changed from the time i first meet them to the time i see them graduate and the best way i have to describe that is transformation. intervarsity does not give commission each time i mention it...

reunite!

this past weekend was the LIT reunion and what a reunion it was. i am yet again amazed by the amount of energy a teenager can exert when they are motivated to. after the first evening of high pitched "i-missed-yous!" and "your-hair-is-so-cools," the excitment calmed down a little and everyone seemed to really enjoy being able to hang out and chat together once again. we had some great teaching/worship/discussion times and i hope that it was a good weekend for many of the LITs to reflect on how their faith has grown or not grown since they returned to school.
i was really encouraged to see many of the staff come for the weekend and continue to invest in LITs they first met in the summer.
as usual, i came back from the retreat being a lot more tired than when i left but it was definitely worth it.

post-retreat thoughts...

well, i had quite a good time on the retreat this weekend. we were fortunate enough to have alison siewert come and speak for our community this weekend. she spoke mostly of Jesus and how different people responded to him (pharisees, the sick, the disciples). i am always amazed that i often can't get enough of Jesus. he's like an onion...so many layers. i'll save the details of the retreat for my newsletter, so you don't have to read the same stories twice.
i had a great conversation today with the student team leader, rebecca. i miss having regular conversations with students since i have been focussing on fundraising. i was so encouraged to listen to her speak about what she has been learning through the semester so far. i also feel like i can actually say i see how she has been transformed by God in the process. it was good timing too as i have been feeling a little discouraged lately because i feel disconnected from the day-to-day of campus life. it is this stuff that i miss the most because it is so exciting to be a part of.