the world is in hamilton...

i just got back from our annual NVEST conference and i'm exhausted. while the humidity sucked the life out of me, the conference was fortunately putting it right back in. our conference was put on the front end of the World Assembly conference for the International Fellowship of Evangelical Students (IFES), which is the meeting of student ministry workers from around the world. it is currently happening right here in hamilton at redeemer university, and it has been quite the experience so far.

we were privileged to hear from the regional directors of a number of different areas of the world, where student ministries are having a signifcant impact on campuses but also on cities, countries and continents. there has been a great deal of partnership between the canadian intervarsity movement and other student movements around the world and it is really inspiring to hear how we are all working together in building the Kingdom.

since coming home, i have been giving my full effort to fundraising and meeting my new budget goal. it is weird that after hearing this huge big picture vision for student ministry globally, i have suddenly gained a new energy for the local picture. i realized that the amazing stories that i have heard from around the world can happen at MAC too. i know that i need to put in this effort so i can continue to be involved in this ministry and finances won't pull me away from it again as they did in the fall.

stay tuned for the stories of how Jesus is going to pull this off...

100!

this is my 100th post on cole's notes and i am so happy that it is one telling you all great news. this actually happened last week but due to technical problems (ie. computer viruses) i am only now able to post that i have found a house to move into for the fall. i wasn't looking very long but it seemed so drawn out because there were just so few places that fit what we were looking for in a house. patience paid off, however, because the house we got is a palace compared to all the other tiny, underground, caves that i saw (and lived in for the last 2 years). finding nice student housing is always tough because many landlords don't really hold the bar too high in terms of living standards. every room possible is turned into a bedroom, leaving no space for people to actually live in. i've seen 7 bedrooms in the tiniest of houses so to find a house with a big common room, nice kitchen and even an extra bedroom for a guest room/office, i knew that it was the right one. unfortunately, so did another group but after an intense day and a half, Jesus got us this house and the lease has been signed.
it feels really cheesy and somewhat shallow at times to just say Jesus provided us with this house but i know on the deepest level, that's really the only reason we have it. there is so much about this house that i can just see has the 'jesus stamp of approval' on. i could go into the whole story, which i think is very dramatic and covered with divine intervention but due to the number of blank and frankly disappointed faces i have seen after sharing it in person, i feel it won't have as great an impact as it did on me. we all have those stories and moments that we know we have felt Jesus intervene and no one else seems to get it. well, i'm not going to lose sleep over it but just know that God did something good last week.
i will be moving in September so be sure to stop by for a visit. the more the merrier (since we actually have the space to put them...)

fallen trees and jesus candles...

i'm a little tardy on getting a post-planning weekend post up, but i figured better late than never. the short story is we had a great time. the long story isn't really much longer but to make this more interesting, i will give a little more info about the happenings of the weekend.

the weekend started off with a bit of a panicked phone call telling us that the power had gone out because of a huge storm and no one was sure when it would be coming back. after a quick stop to pick up some candles, like a bunch of troopers, the team was still game to head out to turkey point to make the best of it. when we arrived, there was a very large tree uprooted on the lawn of the cottage we were staying at (which turned out to be the newest tourist local for most weekend visitors) and we heard a wonderful testimony from the neighbour that God had saved both his car and his house from getting crushed. amen.

the first night we spent some good quality time by candle light. it was pretty relaxed as most people were very tired from a week at work. the following morning, some of us woke up to laura's dad cutting up the tree that had fallen the day before and cleaning up the whole mess in like 30 minutes. i was fully impressed. after admiring a job well done, we spent the rest of the day in scripture and forming a vision for our ministry this coming school year. we studied a passage from luke 10 and felt called to be a community of hospitality on campus, extending ourselves in relationship to others and waiting to see how Jesus would work through them.

we got power back around 5:30pm, which was great because the cooler wasn't going to last much longer and i certainly didn't want food poisoning (although it would be a great bonding moment) to be one of our lasting memories for the weekend.

day two was focussed on planning events and talking about what we would need to do to be more hospitable at large group, in small groups and in our homes. while we didn't get too much set in stone, we have some good brainstorming done and creative thoughts on how to welcome new comers in the fall. we were also able to take the afternoon off (for any old school mac IV leadership team people, you may be outraged at this thought because we always said it couldn't be done. well, turns out it can, but only because of all the sacrifices you made, and its awesome) and we headed to the beach.

sunburnt and bonded, we ended on the third day with a commissioning time after our brunch as the staff prayed for each student and the team as a whole, asking for them to be sent out just as Jesus sent out the 72 as we read luke 10. i am anticipating some big things happening in the fall as it seems tat Jesus is at work already in the lives of these students.

it was a great challenge for me to enter into this weekend in a new role, having to take on different responsibilities and really having no idea what the "right" thing to do is. i am continuing to pray that God will just work through it all and that we will consistently acknowledge that it is His ministry and always will be.

time flies...

in just a few days we will be heading to turkey point for our planning weekend. it is so hard to believe that this time has already arrived but with the amount of prep i have to do this week, i am feeling it. may was much busier for me than in years past and we are already a week into june. so crazy.

to give you the quickest updates on what i did through may, i have been working on fundraising, leading a weekely bible study with students who are kicking around Hamilton for the summer, i took a one week intensive course on genesis and i have been helping friends fix-up their backyard. all of those things have been going well. the yard fix-up did a number on my old muscles but they are healing nicely and the yard is better for it.

now all my attention is focussed on this upcoming weekend. it has been exciting/strange planning for it because it seems like our time together will be so much more relaxed than i am used to. back in the days of being a student leader myself, the planning weekend meant 4 days of intense, non-stop discussion, and the only breaks we took were for meals (short ones) and sleeping. this year, we are getting together for 2 1/2 days and have planned to take a whole afternoon off together for a little beach excursion. the reason why this is possible, in my opinion, is because our leaders are coming into this weekend with such a strong sense of the vision of our ministry so we won't have to spend hours trying to figure it out. only one student has not studied the first half of the gospel of mark (a huge foundation for our vision) which starts us off at an amazing point that usually we don't reach until december. God has been so active in transforming students over the last 3 years that now we have to make some major changes to our visioning and planning process, which i don't mind doing at all but i really don't know what the new thing should be. this year's planning weekend will be experimental in some ways (hopefully without major explosions) but that seems to have been the theme for this ministry over the last couple of years and God has always showed up to pull us through...why would he stop now?

if you can remember, please pray for us as we are meeting this weekend. we will be planning for the first semester and need an openness to be creative and imaginative with events but not hold too tightly to them so that we forget about the people that they are for. also, pray that the team will continue to bond. it has been quite a while since we have all been together and we will have some catching up to do. lastly, please pray that we will be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and be open to the ways God wants to transform us during the year and not just focus on other's needs for growth.

come and see...

tonight i had a prep meeting with a student who will be helping me lead the summer bible study which is really the only sort of program MAC IV has going over the summer. the theme for our study is 'encounters with Jesus' and we are starting off with the first disciples interacting with Jesus as they decide to follow him. the phrase "come and see" comes up twice and seems to be a significant part of discovering who Jesus actually is.
what stood out most to me in our prep, however, was this student agreeing that "coming and seeing" was a big part of his own growth over the last year. there are things about Jesus that really don't make sense until you go and find him for yourself. there are ways that he works that require us to say yes to before we really know what it is we signed on for. and for this student, he is starting to see others come to Jesus in the same way because he has invited them to "come and see."
i hope this trend continues...

back to reality...

so i am now back from city/script and it feels like summer has officially begun. i decided that i needed to take today off after a very intense week at city/script. having to put energy into both teaching and being a staff worker was quite a push but i have arrived at the end a little surprised that i can still walk. most people have pointed out that my ability to speak english has suffered (although i wasn't all too fluent to begin with) but i am sure getting some good sleep over the next week will get that all sorted out.

just to summarize the week, studying scripture = good, experiencing the city = good, Jesus = very good, the food = mostly greasy. i hope to write more about the week after i get a chance to process it for myself as well as do the rounds to catch up with students who were there. the one thing about teaching is that you don't have much time to actually be a staff worker so i feel like i still have a lot to hear from people about what Jesus was/is doing in their hearts.

now that i am back, i decided to start putting the book of Mark into action right away and i have started to explore my new neighbourhood. the weekend before city/script, i moved from west hamilton (close to campus) into hamilton's north end to live with some friends for the summer. the north end is an interesting neighbourhood as it is composed mostly of low income families and is currently under the pressure of being regentrified in response to development of the harbour front. it is truly on 'the other side of the tracks' being north of downtown, which faces problems of its own.

i walked along barton st. which is home to a prison, a hospital, and a shockingly low number of tim hortons (i counted only one between john st. and sherman st. ... i thought this was hamilton?). there are also probably 4 empty store fronts for every full one and an obvious 'ghost town' feel to the whole area. my oma is always telling me stories of back in the day when my opa and her would join friends of theirs to go shopping along barton but it is far from that picture today.

it is a place deemed "unclean," to use Mark terminology, and i am hoping that through the summer i can look deeper to see how Jesus is in there cleaning it up and restoring the people who live here.

look closer...

well we are officially at the half way point in our week at city/script and so far things have been just great. although we are not close to the half way mark in the text, it has been an overwhelming week of seeing Jesus and ourselves in a new way. our study group has been interacting with one another really well and is engaged in the process of observing, interpreting and applying the book of Mark to their lives.
as i have been co-teaching the study this year, i have felt so challenged and incompetent but God is definitely at work among us. i am co-teaching i am trying to process all of it (and hope to write more as i do) but from this point, there is a great deal of mystery in how this is all piecing together.
we are heading out into the city tonight to 'observe' it from a new angle. it has been a very significant event in the past and i am anticipating that it will be again this year. it is amazing how much you just never saw before, both in scripture and in life, that if you just take the time to look you will see for the first time...

speeding toward the stop light...

the end of the year is in sight. in many ways, it is a huge sigh of relief for all the hard work that students have put into classes this semester. for me today, however, it feels a little sad that we're approaching the summer and regular campus life will change for 4 months. it is great to have the beautiful warm weather and the lighter schedule with more outdoor meetings, but in many ways i feel that there is such a great momentum for what is happening within our community that i wish we had a couple more months to see this thing out. i know it will pick up again in the fall but i just wish i had a better way of keeping us moving all together through the summer months.
i hope that city/script can play a bigger role in that this year. we are hoping to have at least twice as many students as last year attend and it serves as a great foundation to build things off of. i guess i'm just feeling that there is so much that God is doing, and so much more that can happen and it feels like it has a false ending right now because people will be heading separate ways for the summer. if only i could offer everyone a summer job so they could stay around campus for the summer. time to open a factory...

same old new beginning...

on saturday we had our first meeting with the incoming student leadership team for next year. i really enjoyed our day together studying some scripture and getting to know each other. there are only 1 or 2 students that i don't know very well on the team but it was exciting to see them all interact and start to bond as a team.
they all seem a little nervous and a little uncertain but they are definitely eager to get started. this is a common characteristic i have seen in each of the leadership teams i have worked with (this being #4). soon it will hard to believe they were even strangers. the jokes will fly, the trust will hopefully be strong, and i pray that God will be working miraculously through them on campus and in each other's lives.

sight to see...

walking on campus, i saw two unfamiliar sights. first, there were geese crossing the road. second, there were people smiling.
we've hit that time of year in the university calendar when reading week has passed and everyone is just waiting for exams to be over. it is so easy to just get caught up in the routine of campus and forget what the rest of the world is like. that's why geese become such a big deal. it quickly becomes noticable how campus only represents a small portion of life. don't get me wrong, our campus is very diverse, with people of all different backgrounds, beliefs, and lifestyles. there are just a lot of adults (or people striving to be adults) who seem to have convinced themselves that academia is the most important part of life. throw in a goose or two and you get a response from people that reminds you they are people. watch a child walk around campus and they will suddenly become the most imporant person there, and everyone is aware of their presence.
i too am hoping that exams are over soon (mostly because that means the weather will be warmer) but i hope we don't miss out on life in the meantime.

auto-pilot...

so i think i'm starting to get the point. there has just been story after story i've heard lately about how Jesus is changing people's lives on our campus and i am finally understanding that i have no control over it. the last few weeks have just brought so many moments and accounts of the mysterious work of the Kingdom it is oozingly obvious that i had nothing to do with it.
case in point, my small group.
last week i had three days of staff training and left robyn, the student i co-lead bible study with alone to lead our group. we were both nervous about it because she had some frustrating experiences leading so far this semester so leading alone didn't appeal to her at all. the amazing thing though is that Jesus loves weakness (not in a twisted way) but he totally steps in to help those who realize they just can't do it without him. chatting with robyn we i got back, it was so obvious that she had experienced Jesus being with her at our small group and her excitement for our small group was overwhelming. i still get a huge goofy smile on my face when i think about it now (and i feel like kind of a geek when people ask me while i am smiling...)
realizing the power Jesus has to change things and people that i just can't has been a hard but very freeing lesson to learn. i keep wanting to take control back into my own hands (i think i know all the answers after all) but i'm slowly learning it is better for me to have as little control as possible.
we're heading into reading week next week and once we all return from that, the year will just sail through to the end. perfect timing for me to hand over control...

strangest thing someone has ever eaten in class...

today in history a girl brought a candy apple to snack on.

where does someone buy a candy apple on campus?

how does someone decide a candy apple is the best snack choice for a university class?

i mean, a caramel apple i would totally understand because those things are delicious but a candy apple is a whole different story.

retreating to the city...

yesterday we held our first ever one-day winter conference in the place of our classic winter retreat and i am so glad we decided to make the change. the day was unbelievable on so many levels and i think really came in line with who we are as a community right now and where we are headed in our ministry.

we held our conference at the frwy cafe, a small cafe in downtown hamilton run by a salvation army church plant. the cafe itself is located in the beasley neighbourhood, which is one of canada's poorest nieghbourhoods (third to be exact after regent park in toronto and vancouver's downtown eastside). it was an awesome space for a morning of scripture study, where we dug into isaiah 58 (check it out for yourself) and opened our hearts to the fast God desired Israel to engage in. after our study, we headed out into groups for lunch in the nieghbourhood and had a couple questions to think about this neighbourhood. it was an eye opening experience. sometimes it really shocks me to think that this nieghbourhood is only a 15 minute bus ride away from the MAC campus because it feels like a whole different world. pernell, the pastor of frwy, helped us to debrief our afternoon out in the city and shared his own experience of living in this neighbourhood.

after dinner we sat around and discussed how we could apply this to our campus, specifically thinking of those students who are in first year, living in residence. the discussion was encouraging as people began to see the 'homelessness' of sorts that exists on our own campus and how we can begin sharing our lives with others who feel displaced or marginalized at the university.

we ended the day off with a coffeehouse and good old fashioned hang out time. it was great to have students so involved in all aspects of the day, participating in scripture study and discussions, interacting in the nieghbourhood, and sharing their talents and lives with one another. the day for me had such a redemptive element and promise to us as staff and the community.

we went out on a limb with a number of different changes to our structure this year (the conference being just one of them) without really knowing what would happen but each time God has continued to reveal Himself to us and it is just awe inspiring. we have had to be so dependent on Him through these changes and while it really never ends up looking the way i expect it to, Jesus NEVER fails us.

diet of worms...

january is just slipping away and i can't believe that it is already the 22nd. i forgot how busy things are when i am actually involved on campus. meetings with students, meetings with staff, meetings with supporters, visioning and planning for upcoming events, prepping teaching stuff...all this makes a month feel like a week.
i had dinner with some friends from undergrad a little over a week ago and i got some good feedback on this blog. one friend said 'your blog used to be good.' hmm...thanks. apparently my postings here sound a little too businessy and not enough like me so i am going to try to remedy that. let's hope the problem isn't that i actually am more businessy (or is it businessie?) than i used to be.
today in my history class we learned about the Diet of Worms. it was a strong reminder of how important it is to pay attention in class because it took a while for me to realize that this was not actually about what Martin Luther ate in his excommunication but that it is actually written in german. Diet of Worms in english is much different than deet of vorms, as it is is pronounced in german.

new year, new goal...

classes started yesterday and i am making my triumphant return to campus! that's right, in true God fashion, He was faithful to provide the funding i needed to reach my halftime goal and i can now return to messing in the lives of students. i must admit, it came just in time because i was starting to go crazy spending most of my week fundraising. don't get me wrong, the meeting with people part of fundraising is great but for someone like myself who is administratively challenged, the letter writing and number crunching is less than ideal.
the fundraising is not over, however, since i am now convinced that full-time staff (and a full-time budget) is what God is calling me to. this NEEDS prayer.

a tiny post-urbana thought...

i am back safe and sound after a week in st. louis for URBANA and i am just starting to feel settled from how overwhelming the whole experience was. there were 22, 000 people representing roughly 130 nations, all coming together to find God's calling for their life. it meant standing in a lot of long lines, but i survived.
there is so much that i am still processing from the whole experience but i know that it has changed me and many others and i can only imagine the difference this will have on our campus. the good conversations with students have only just begun and the majority have realized how uncomfortable they are with being comfortable and they are ready for God to make drastic change in their lives. i can work with this...
stay tuned for more urbana thoughts over the month.

countdown is on...

in just one week, i will be boarding a plane for st.louis, missouri (with a breif layover in chicago) for urbana. it will be my first time at urbana so i am not sure what exactly to expect but from what i have heard from others, it should be quite the experience. i am mostly looking forward to it because my role there will be as a small group leader for 4 MAC students while we study ephesians together. it will be so nice to have some good quality time with students having been absent from campus this semester, especially studying scripture together. after studying ephesians with staff this summer, i am anticipating that it will be an amazing experience for students and i am excited to see what will develop on our campus and in the lives of students.
if you remember, please pray for those heading to urbana, that we will be open to God and what He may have to say to us while we are there.

let the exams begin...

today was the first day of no more classes (making yesterday the last day of classes) and the vibe around campus and the student neighbourhoods already feels different. the huge snowfall last night certainly helped create a holiday mood around here but most people i chat with seem happy that the end of the semester is nearing.
a lot of people find exam time is stressful but it seems more managable to me because you don't have to attend lectures and hand in assignments and essays, while trying to fit in study time. it will be a great time for me to catch up with students that i haven't seen all semester and to put in that last push for fundraising so i can return (triumphantly) to campus in january.
i have one take home keeping me from finishing up my semester. i was hoping to get it done nice a early so i wouldn't have to have it hanging over my head for the next week but that is proving harder than i thought.

christmas party curcuit...

tonight was the MAC IV christmas party. the traditional banquet in a church hall idea was scrapped this year and replaced by a house party and i fully support this decision. the whole thing seemed less formal and stuffy and people really seemed to just enjoy hanging out, spreading some good cheer.
it was nice to be able to catch up with some students i haven't seen all semester since i have been focusing on fundraising. it confirms my desire to return to campus. i really miss being a part of the every day stuff and feeling like i know what is going on in people's lives. focusing on my fundraising now will ensure that i will be able to do this long term but i just wish i could have both at the same time.
our small group will be meeting tomorrow night for the last time this semester too. i have to get my favourite christmas treat ready to share with everyone. so many options to choose from...

middle of november...

i am way overdue for a posting and november has just been packed so there will be plenty to write. the month started out with a history paper for me (first time to the library all year) and since then i can't account for how fast time seems to be going. this is going to be a long one so get comfortable.

i was invited to speak at wilfred laurier's large group on the 8th and had a great time hanging out with the students there. i taught about the ongoing process of learning about Jesus and they were a real chatty bunch when it came to small group discussion time. sometimes it feels like a cross-cultural experience going on to a different university campus because although the university context is one i am quite experienced with, laurier students are very different than mcmaster students when i comes to certain things. it isn't that one is better than the other but i'll just tell you, schools can be different. i also had a chance to visit with dana and andrew, intervarsity staff at laurier, and andrew's wife, kim and their brand new baby girl, eliyah. she is very cute and has a crazy head of hair which i am pretty sure is a little baby wig.

the following friday i spoke at the WAKE youth event in ingersoll, ON. i was invited to this event by my very own youth leaders from back in vankleek hill, doug and patsy brown. i had dinner with them and their daughter chelsey, who i remembered as being 8 but now is in grade 10 (felt a little old in that moment). it was so nice to catch up with them and to see them continue to invest time and energy into this youth at their church, just as they did for me back in the day. i realized how thankful i am for their time and their energy and how it has totally contributed to me being in ministry.

i went straight from ingersoll up to ontario pioneer camp to join the youth from forestview church in oakville for their fall retreat. this is the church that planted the church that i am currently attending (forestview hamilton) so it was great to be able get to know some people from our "sister" church. i taught about 'faithfully improvising God's story' and i think it went over fairly well. it was definitely a large topic to tackle in one weekend but my hope is that the youth will continue to think about it and talk with their leaders as they decide to be a part of building the kingdom. better luck next time to team wignall. we might have gotten last place but that doesn't mean we don't have any spirit.

i spent wednesday to friday of this week at five oaks retreat centre near brantford, ON with other ontario staff for some training time. the chairs were a little uncomfortable and the building we slept in reminded me of a retirement home. it was more relaxing than i thought, having already been away from home for a week, and i enjoyed catching up with staff from around the province.

so now it is the middle of november and i am back to work on fundraising. we had planned to have a thank you reception for our supporters but decided to postpone it because it seems to be a busy time of year for many and a number of people were not able to attend. i'll be starting to figure out the details for the rescheduled event as well as try to get the last bit of my fundraising in so i can return to campus in january. if you think of it, please pray that the money needed will be provided.